Primitive mattress
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The primitive mattress is now a two-step process requiring an uninstalled primitive mattress. It does not require any tools to make into actual furniture. However, it does take a couple of hours because apparently trying to decide whether it looks better near the window or the other wall next to the flower vase takes that...much...time.
(Note: sarcastic eyeroll not included and is purely a figment of the author's own insecurities.)